6 or 7 Things You Can Do at Home on 6/7
LEWIS COUNTY, WA — With June 7 officially upon us, families across the nation are preparing to celebrate the sacred internet holiday known simply as “6/7,” a phrase nobody understands but every child under 15 says with the confidence of someone delivering breaking news from Mount Sinai. Since leaving the house would only expose you to even more people saying it in public, experts recommend observing the day safely from home. Here are 6 or 7 things you can do at home on 6/7.
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Walk into every room and say “six-seven” for no reason
Open the fridge, check the mail, stare at the laundry pile, and simply say “six-seven.” Do not explain yourself, because that would require knowing what it means.
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Ask your kids what it means
Your child will either laugh, say “You wouldn’t get it,” or suddenly act like they are protecting classified government documents. This is normal and means the ritual is working.
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Make dinner “six-seven themed”
Serve six or seven chicken nuggets, fries, grapes, or whatever food your child requested and then immediately decided was disgusting. Congratulations, you have created a holiday meal.
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Declare the living room a six-seven-free zone
This ban will last approximately six or seven seconds. Once the phrase enters your home, removing it requires patience, prayer, and possibly changing the Wi-Fi password.
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Use it during household chores
Fold six or seven towels or pick up six or seven mystery socks from the floor. If nobody helps, tell them their attitude is “not very six-seven.”
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Explain the trend to your spouse using facts you made up
Say it started as a basketball thing, became a meme, and is now mostly used by children to emotionally defeat adults with nonsense. Say this confidently enough and it will sound true.
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Accept that your home belongs to the internet now
There was a time when parents controlled the culture inside their own homes. Now two random numbers can enter through a phone screen and turn your living room into a haunted calculator.
So this 6/7, stay home, stay safe, and try to enjoy the holiday. After all, nobody knows what it means, but at this point, that may be the most six-seven thing of all.
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6 or 7 Things You Can Do at Home on 6/7
