Space Overlord Furious After Being Snubbed by Parade in Town Named After Him
VADER, WA - A certain space overlord, who asked to have is identity hidden, voiced his deep disappointment after not receiving an invitation to a small Earth town’s May Day parade—despite the town literally being named after him. “I descended from the stars and graciously gave this town a new name,” he said, pacing angrily before a fleet of silent drones. “And yet, not a single float. Not even a banner.”
Local leaders claimed the omission was unintentional, stating the parade was meant to “celebrate spring, flowers, and civic togetherness,” not “acknowledge evil oppressors, regardless of how charismatic the villain may have been.” The event featured homemade costumes, local emergency services, and floats—none of which even slightly resembled a galactic throne or laser obelisk. When asked why the town still bears the space tyrant’s name, one official replied, “We didn’t want to go through the paperwork.”
The Overlord has vowed that next year’s parade will “feature him, or feature consequences,” and has begun drafting plans for a rival float including a sound system broadcasting ominous monologues and a firework display spelling out “REMEMBER WHO RULES YOU.” Locals are quietly considering moving the celebration underground.
-Dean
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