No Kings Protesters Take to the Streets of Centralia, WA to Remind Citizens That Trump Is Our President
CENTRALIA, WA — In what was intended to be a protest against patriarchy and authoritarianism, the 'No Kings' movement accidentally hosted the most pro-Trump rally Lewis County has seen since the last yard sale at the fairgrounds.
Local | 2025/06/22
Sean Swope Channels William Wallace—Declares Lewis County “Non-Sanctuaried” with Tartan-Topped Proclamation
LEWIS COUNTY, WA - They say we’re a 'sanctuary county,' lumped in with big-city strongholds of open borders—and Lewis County’s finest nearly choked on their coffee when they saw the DHS list.
Local | 2025/06/08
In a huge misunderstanding, a Chehalis man was arrested after exposing his wenis
CHEHALIS, WA — What began as an innocent park stroll at Stan Hedwall Park on Saturday afternoon quickly devolved into a full-blown police intervention when a 42-year-old local resident innocently lifted his sleeve to reveal his 'wenis.'
Local | 2025/06/08
Panhandlers Form Union, Claim Territorial Rights to I-5 Ramp Meters
LEWIS COUNTY, WA -With the introduction of ramp meters on I-5 in Lewis County, panhandlers across the region are rejoicing at what they call a 'once-in-a-generation business expansion.'
Local | 2025/05/26
ADNA: Locals Furious That County is fixing what they complained about them not fixing.
BUNKER CREEK RD,ADNA, WA – To the Adna locals, Complaining about 'inaction', is easier than living through the 'action'. Adnoids are seeing their tax dollars in action and they're not happy about it.
Local | 2025/05/17
Space Overlord Furious After Being Snubbed by Parade in Town Named After Him
VADER, WA - A certain space overlord, who asked to have is identity hidden, voiced his deep disappointment after not receiving an invitation to a small Earth town’s May Day parade—despite the town literally being named after him.
Local | 2025/05/09
5 signs of a Lewis County Soccer Mom in 2025
Lewis County, WA – The - Soccer Mom - evolution has made quite the transformation since the 1980's. From affordable Mini Vans to untouchable Mega SUV's -- Here we've compiled a short list of how to identify a soccer mom in 2025.
Local | 2025/04/27
Napavine Residents Warned to “Brace for Chaos” as Road Striping Season Looms Like a Hungover Picasso
NAPAVINE, WA — City officials have issued a formal warning to residents: “Brace for chaos.” The announcement comes ahead of the annual road striping season, which in Napavine is less a maintenance project and more a community-wide endurance test.
Local | 2025/04/19
Scientists Stunned as Jesus’ Tomb Found Empty—2,000 Years Later, Still No Bones
JERUSALEM - In a stunning display of academic head-scratching, a team of world-renowned archaeologists and scientists announced today they are 'completely dumbfounded' by the discovery of an ancient tomb labeled 'Jesus' that contains—brace yourself—absolutely nothing.
Science | 2025/04/18
Karens Spread Like an Infection in Lewis County, Sparking Over-the-Top Reactions Everywhere
LEWIS COUNTY, WA - In recent weeks, Lewis County has seen an alarming increase in the number of 'Karens' — a term for individuals, often middle-aged women, who are quick to complain and demand special treatment, usually with an over-the-top sense of entitlement.
Local | 2025/04/13
Pe Ell Man Accused of Maintaining Eye Contact While Eating Banana -- Now Deeply Regrets Decision
PE ELL, WA - What started as a harmless afternoon snack has turned into a small-town scandal after local resident Gary -Banana Eyes- Thompson made the unsettling choice to maintain full, unbroken eye contact while eating a banana at the Pe Ell gas station.
Local | 2025/04/12
Fowl Play at Lewis County Coffee: Live Chicken Spotted Riding Shotgun, Sparks Feathery Debate
CENTRALIA, WA - Lewis County Coffee customers got more than their usual caffeine fix this week when an observant patron noticed a live chicken comfortably nestled in a parked car outside the coffee shop
Local | 2025/04/12