Local hero returns purse found in Home Depot parking lot, rewarded with honorary birdhouse builders kit.
CHEHALIS, WA - In a heartwarming twist that momentarily restored faith in humanity, a local good Samaritan discovered an abandoned purse at Home Depot and chose the path less traveled -- turning it in. Witnesses say the individual resisted the temptation of unspent gift cards and expired gum, instead marching the lost bag straight to customer service.
Local | 2025/04/12
Washington State: Pro-Choice for Everything But Your Marlboro Menthol
OLYMPIA, WA - In a cringe display of legislative gymnastics, Washington State lawmakers have decided that while your body is absolutely your choice, unless, of course, you’d like to fill it with anything flavored like cherry tobacco.
Local | 2025/04/08
Mass Hysteria Erupts in Centralia as WinCo Foods Opens 24/7 as Walmart Scrambles to Hold the Line
CENTRALIA, WA — The grand opening of WinCo Foods has sent shockwaves through Centralia, as thousands (maybe hundreds) of determined shoppers stormed the aisles in search of 24/7 access to bulk snacks. Eyewitnesses reported scenes of cart-jousting and frantic potato-grabbing as locals declared freedom from their former Walmart allegiance.
Local | 2025/04/07
Cape-Wearing Commissioner Sean Swope Rides Natural Gas Tank Into Battle Against Statewide Ban
LEWIS COUNTY, WA — In a historic display of heroism that historians are already comparing to Paul Revere, local legend and gas-powered gladiator Sean Swope has passed a resolution to protect the good people of Lewis County from the looming threat of natural gas bans sweeping across the state of Washington.
Local | 2025/04/06
Democrats Rally Behind Mexican Gang Member Dad, Claim - He's Just Misunderstood
MARYLAND - In a groundbreaking move of empathy-over-logic, Democrats urge the nation to reconsider the deportation of Kilmar Armando Abrego Garcia, a man they think might just need a hug.
National | 2025/04/04
Teen Criminal Masterminds Confounded That Beating a Man, Stealing Car, Brandishing Gun Leads to Standoff With SWAT
CHEHALIS, WA — In what will surely go down as one of the most brilliant criminal schemes of the decade, two teenage boys with a stolen car, armed with a stolen gun, found themselves utterly baffled when their actions led to an hours-long standoff with law enforcement.
Local | 2025/04/03
Bob Ferguson's Master Plan: 10 Ingenious Taxes to Fund the - Department of No Fun
OLYMPIA, WA - Washington State's Governor Bob Ferguson Unveils Brilliant Blueprint to Ensure No Citizen Escapes the Joyless Grip of the State.
State | 2025/04/03
Bob Ferguson claims he's unaware of the vandalized Tesla Charging Station in Centralia.
CENTRALIA, WA - Governor Bob The Turd Ferguson confused as to why anyone would think that state Democrats had anything to do with the vandalism of Centralia's Tesla charging station.
Politics | 2025/03/22
Local heroes save the day after woman with horrible eye sight reports a cat stuck in tree
CHEHALIS, WA – A normal day turns into anything but, for a local Chehalis woman, as she spots a stranded cat atop a tree and summons local heroes to rescue it
Local | 2025/03/17
Brummer shows up for photo op in pajama's, Swears he wasn't sleeping.
LEWIS COUNTY, WA - County Commissioners wake up from slumber to get their photo taken for the local news paper to honor employees that actually do their jobs. Brummer didn't get formal memo.
Local | 2025/03/16
Lewis County Sheriffs Office now imposing Tariffs on all criminals that want to commit crime.
LEWIS COUNTY, WA - As another way to combat the current budget crisis, Lewis County has proposed new legislation that will impose steep tariffs on criminals that want to do crime.
Local | 2025/03/09
With the arrival of Chick-Fil-A, Centralia expecting epic Sign Battles.. Or Else!
CENTRALIA, WA - As a condition to build in Centralia Station, located off I-5 at exit 81, Chick-fil-a must participate and initiate sign battles with local businesses.
Food | 2025/03/09