After 25 Years, Local Rocker Tells Girlfriend “The Band’s Gonna Make It”
CHEHALIS, WA — Middle-aged local rocker insists his band is finally about to make it after 25 years, despite living with his parents and playing mostly empty local gigs.
Music | May 1, 2026
New Lewis County Budget Analyst Says “You Should’ve Checked Trivago”
CHEHALIS, WS — Lewis County’s new budget analyst brings a Trivago-inspired approach to local spending, urging officials to compare prices before buying anything ever again.
Budget | May 2, 2026
Zac Eckstein Opposes Picking Fights, Except Apparently on Facebook
LEWIS COUNTY, WA — Zac Eckstein says leaders should not pick fights. This article revisits a Lewis County Democrats Facebook post that did exactly that.
NOT SATIRE | April 12, 2026
Lewis County Begins 2027 Budget, Discovers Money Still an Issue
LEWIS COUNTY — County officials are beginning work on the 2027 budget, initiating the annual process of determining how to pay for roads, employees, public safety, buildings and approximately 400 things residents assumed were funded by “the state or something.”
Local | September 19, 2026
New Commissioner Shocked To Learn Experienced Officials Don’t Immediately Set Fire To Legal Strategy In First 90 Days
CENTRALIA, Wash. — Port of Centralia Commissioner Ally Pickard reportedly expressed frustration this week after veteran commissioners Peter Lahmann and Kyle Markstrom declined to abandon an ongoing legal strategy simply because the newest person in the room had a fresh feeling about it.
General | April 11, 2026
No Kings Protesters Take to the Streets of Centralia, WA to Remind Citizens That Trump Is Our President
CENTRALIA, WA — In what was intended to be a protest against patriarchy and authoritarianism, the 'No Kings' movement accidentally hosted the most pro-Trump rally Lewis County has seen since the last yard sale at the fairgrounds.
Local | 2025/06/22
High Tobacco Taxes Force Local Man To Quit Job, Enter Underground Tobacco Trade
LEWIS COUNTY, WA — A local man reportedly quits his job to join Washington’s underground tobacco trade after state taxes make cigarettes and dip feel like luxury items.
Self EMPLOYMENT | April 15, 2026
Pe Ell Man Accused of Maintaining Eye Contact While Eating Banana -- Now Deeply Regrets Decision
PE ELL, WA - What started as a harmless afternoon snack has turned into a small-town scandal after local resident Gary -Banana Eyes- Thompson made the unsettling choice to maintain full, unbroken eye contact while eating a banana at the Pe Ell gas station.
Local | 2025/04/12
City of Napavine to add 16 more fuel stations to Exit 72, because why not?
NAPAVINE,WA - In a stunning turn of events this week, Napavine agreed to add 16 more fuel stations just off Interstate 5 at Exit 72. When asked why, we were told, why not...
Local | 2025/04/19
Local Dad Celebrates Plugging HDMI Cable In on First Try
NAPAVINE — Local dad achieves the impossible by plugging in an HDMI cable on the first try, then celebrates accordingly with a Busch Light.
Winning | September 20, 2026
Centralia Pride Event Followed Closely By Disinfectant Event
CENTRALIA, WA — City Brings Out Hazmat Team Just in Case the Rainbow Was Contagious
Local | 2025/07/20
Local Man’s Confidence Shattered After ‘Peel Here’ Wrapper Refuses to Do So
GLENOMA, WA — A local man’s confidence is shattered after a cheese stick wrapper clearly labeled “Peel Here” refuses to open, forcing him to hand it to his wife in defeat.
General | May 3, 2026